Another Bush Christmas
- Prof C
- Dec 28, 2024
- 10 min read
by Ashley
Well, another Christmas has come and gone, during our stay in Alaska. Last Christmas, I reflected on how nice it was to have so much down time, and none of the typical hustle and bustle of the holidays. This Christmas was pretty much the same. Since school let out, we've spent a lot of time making holiday desserts, watching a lot of holiday movies, playing games, making crafts, and enjoying time together. We've also spent a lot of time hauling deliveries from the plane, hosting open gym at the school, walking the trap line, and enjoying the abundance of snow.
Similar to last year, our gift giving whilst here has been on the frugal side, for a few reasons. One, we are limited in items that can be shipped out here. Two, more money has gone to flights, college expenses, and flying in groceries. But mostly, we are severely limited in our space in this rental home. How many objects do we really want to accumulate during our time here, especially considering we'll have to pay to ship them out, once we leave? Living in this constrained environment has been a great exercise in prioritizing what we value most. Most of what we buy is either something of great need, something we feel that five years of use is worth the price, or something that we're willing to pay to ship it back out eventually. As such, the gifts under our little tree this year were very much consumable or practical in nature.
Josh and Avery FINALLY got phones. We've been holding out for each of our kids as long as possible, knowing the detriments of children having personal devices at far too young of an age. Our rationale for our older girls was they could have a phone whenever they had a need to communicate with us when away from home. For them, that happened around 7th grade, when sports had them traveling out of town. Out here, we didn't initially think there was a pressing need, except that now, our kids have a lot more opportunities of flying to other cities for academic experiences. Josh and Ave were thrilled to finally have their own way to keep in touch with friends back home, and I was thrilled to finally set up our own little family group thread. Of course, we still have ground rules on phone use for all: no phones in the bedrooms at night, and limits to screen time. Being out here, pretty much in the wild, there's actually a risk of spending more time on a screen than life within civilization. With wifi being more consistent now, and the weather too brutal to spend much time outside, there are plenty of days where we are cooped up inside the house. We have to actively construct ways of being indoors without relying too much on screens.
Of course, the girls have really taken to their various crafty hobbies. Emily loves painting nail sets, and sketching and painting as well. Avery has really picked up crocheting and knitting, and thanks to a loom that she got from her Mama Sue and Papa Joe, has made several knitted hats to give to family and friends. She's also continuing her soap making, and was thrilled that she sold most of her inventory at the Christmas Bizarre at the school. Josh is getting into fishing and trapping with Philip, although the skinning and processing part still gets him. Understandable.
Christmas Eve for us was very pleasant, with the day spent enjoying the constant snowfall that lasted all day, and making the big Christmas Eve dinner that we do. We started this tradition several years ago, making a fancy meal with a different meat as the highlight, and we'd set the table with my mom's Joy of Christmas dishes. It was a time for the grandparents and our family to sit around the table, and reflect on the past year, and just enjoy a nice dinner together. We've upheld this tradition since moving here, yet there are some notable differences in its appearance. I left my mom's dishes back in Texas, since obviously, the idea and cost of shipping them here just wasn't practical. Thankfully, Brenda sent us some Christmas paper plates that matched the table linens she sent, so we still had our "fancy" table setting.
Our meal this year was a smoked pork loin, wrapped in bacon, served with a homemade peach-jalapeno barbecue sauce that Philip made.
There is also another obvious absence at the table. With Mom having passed away five years ago, and Joe and Brenda being back in Texas, the table is a lot quieter than what we've been accustomed to, and there is a bittersweet tinge to our holiday gathering. We are so happy to have Jadyn home, and for our six to be reunited again, but we miss the presence of some of our family back in Texas. It's a known fact that we are not staying in Alaska forever. Our stated goal was 5-7 years, so we can say we've given this endeavor a legitimate investment of time and energy, in hopes of making a positive impact. But this adventure will eventually come to a close, and after that, we'll set our sights to a new permanent residence. That new residence will be a cabin in the woods somewhere, big enough to host friends and family during the holidays and summers. We are really looking forward to that next phase. Until then, we'll continue extracting as much as we can from this time of our lives, and making the most of it.
Our Christmas Eve festivities also included the exchanging of a few gifts, including the traditional sibling exchange. In the past, after drawing names, our kids would shop around Target with a designated adult: either myself, Philip, Papa Joe or Mama Sue. The gifts almost always included favorite snacks that would be consumed in the kids' attempt to stay up all-night, while Philip and I wrapped and assembled gifts. Well, obviously, there's no Target here, so we've resorted to either letting them pick out items from our online shopping list from Fred Meyer, or, this year, taking a trip down to the Co-op, to buy their gifts for each other. We've maintained the dollar limit of $15, which out here, really doesn't go far. For example, for that amount, you can buy an individual sized bag of Goldfish and a small, personal-sized cranberry juice (Avery's sibling gift for Jadyn). We have truly learned to be satisfied with far less.
The kids still had fun exchanging their wares. This year, Jadyn also purchased gifts for her siblings, with money she's earned from her job. She was so proud to be more of a giver than a receiver this year. We prefaced up front with her that now that she's an adult, gift giving isn't going to be the same as it's been. Our gifts to her are mostly practical now, helping pay for travel and college costs. She's handling the transition beautifully. Her time at home has been great, and there hasn't been the awkwardness of independence returning to family norms, of which I was wary. Then again, we've always talked with our kids as though they are adults, because Philip and I have always viewed them as autonomous people, separate from us. That is a parenting philosophy that has allowed them to move through different transitions, without us locking them into a fixed point in time. I love the conversations and the jokes that we all share. We authentically love AND LIKE each other, which is something I've always valued, since in my experience, that is not always a given.
After the gift exchange, we watched "It Happened on Fifth Avenue," one of our family's favorites. At the conclusion of our movie watching, the kids took their gifted snacks, and went next door (our principal offered his unit to us while he's gone, to let the kids spread out a bit) to start their all-night marathon of movie watching and game playing. Then Philip and I began wrapping gifts, while "White Christmas" played on the projector. I still enjoy setting out the gifts and filling the stockings, always wondering how we did in choosing gifts our kids will appreciate. Then, once that was done, Philip and I did our own gift exchange, a tradition we started years ago, when the children were small. We never had time to sit and enjoy our gifts for each other, so we did it Christmas Eve night, once the kids were asleep. We've held that tradition ever since. We laughed to ourselves, after reflecting that our gifts to each other this year really highlight the fact that we're getting older. One of my gifts for Philip was a heated back wrap massager, and two of his gifts for me were a heated foot massager and a merino wool blanket. I by far, stay the coldest of all of us out here, so I'm always grateful for things that aid my pitiful body heat.
We were in bed by 11:00, by far one of the earliest times for our Christmas Eve timelines, so we decided to watch another movie in our room. It was during that time, that via text exchanges with Emily, we learned of our kids' apparent years-long tradition of sneaking in at midnight to peek at their stocking gifts. So, as a joke, we locked the door to our unit. At exactly 12:00, we got a text from Emily, begging us to open the door. We eventually obliged, and the evidence of the sneaking was apparent on Christmas morning. :)
So hours later on Christmas morning, Philip and I awoke around 9 am, and had our usual coffee conversation at the table. We then turned on the projector, and began the first round of "A Christmas Story" that both TNT and TBS still show a marathon of, all day. Two hours later, we decided it was time to wake the sleepy heads. Gone are the days when they used to bound in our room at some ungodly early hour, a united energetic posse to wake us, and get Christmas Day started. Now, we have to wake them. We do our best to imitate their younger selves in doing so, and they respond much like we used to, with groggy eyes and confusion. But I sure do miss the child-like excitement they used to have, that they just couldn't contain every 25th of December.
We face timed Papa Joe and Mama Sue, a way of preserving the tradition of them being at our house Christmas morning, to share in the opening of gifts. The kids took turns, opening their gifts, and it seems that we did well this year in our selections. Everyone received slippers, since our toes never do seem to warm up here. Josh got a lot of Cardinals gear, something he can never have too much of, and an iPhone 12. Avery got clothes, a loom, and an iPhone 12 mini. Ems got an organizer back pack for all of her nail polishes and gear, and a heating pad for her feet in bed. Jadyn got a black knitted hat and an Alaska Chicks Co. teal and black hoodie. They all received items to play in the snow: snow fort block molds and snowball makers shaped like ducks, hearts, and regular. We also bought them The Lord of the Rings board game, which we have yet to play, but have heard amazing reviews about it. And of course, their stockings were full of the traditional favorite candies, and a fresh batch of Aaron's Thinking Putty varieties. (Yes, our family still has not outgrown play dough, slime or putty.)
After gifts, it was time for sop chocolate. Ems made our bread the night before, and Philip of course made the sop chocolate. I swear it tastes better every year. Quite possibly because Christmas is pretty much the only time we have it now. Then the rest of the day was spent enjoying our gifts, getting the new phones personalized, playing in the snow, and staying warm with all the new apparel. The snow on Christmas Day was beautiful, with the large wet flakes falling most of the day. Philip laughs at my insatiable desire for snow. In Texas, I was always just hoping for snow, usually watching the forecast play with my emotions. Out here, snow on the ground is a given, but I still hope for actual snowfall on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. This year, Alaska obliged me on both days. We now live with snow for 8 months of the year, and we're still not tired of it.
All in all, our holiday was great, and I'm glad that our family is still pleasantly close, despite being cooped up in such small quarters most of the time. Our time out here in isolation has certainly revealed that our family is well suited to spend so much time and share such a small space together. And our holiday was insanely quiet. All other school staff left for the holidays, which means that once again, we are the only people in our little sequestered neighborhood. If you recall, our house is right across from the school, which is set apart from the rest of the village. We really do have our own little personal neighborhood. And there is a lot about the quiet that we love. So much so, that I never want to live in the suburbs again. But there is plenty that we miss. Joe, Brenda, Liz, Kyle & Gray...this is for you, if you're reading this. We miss you all randomly walking through our door during the holidays, ready to sit around with a fire and a pot of coffee, or Philip's egg nog. I miss sitting and doing puzzles, hoping that we aren't missing any pieces, or hoping that we put the edge together correctly. I miss the sound of our nephew Grayson, running around with his older cousins, usually belting out the lyrics to a song that's stuck in his head. I miss the warmth and sounds of a full house, filled with laughter and good conversation. These are the things we look forward to the most, when our time here is done. Until then, memories and face time will have to do.
I hope you all know how much your words mean to us, and we love hearing from you all. We are doing well here, even though at times, we feel a bit restless, and some days, discouraged. There is still much work to be done here, and there are signs that things are getting better. But there is a sad pending reality pertaining to the future of the villages along the Yukon. Populations are dwindling, the climate is warming, the environment is changing, and the wild food options are declining. I've been doing a lot of research about this area, and the native population that lives here, and estimates have the end of the smaller villages as soon as ten years from now. Especially in a village like ours, where there are only a handful of children left, and no economic viability. Most working adults have had to leave the village to find work, and the wisdom of the elders is dying with them. Philip and I have reflected that there is a good chance that we may be the last teachers to teach at Kaltag School. Quite a sobering thought. I think of the students under our tutelage right now, and wonder what their future holds. Village life is all they've ever known, and yet we have to prepare them for a potential reality in which they may have to leave it. Only time will tell. But in the meantime, we take things one day at a time, and as always, we continue to hope for the best.
As always, thanks for reading. I leave you with pictures of Emily wielding her ice sword. Our family wishes you all a Happy New Year!
Love your sharing with us!!
Ashley, once again, I loved your letter! You have such a beautiful family. You and Phillip have raised your children well. These memories of your time together in Alaska will bond you all even more. I would love to send each of you a little something on Amazon or some other site. Let me know!
Love always,
Debbie Neeley